


Serpentes

by Bee_Haw_Yee_Haw



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Fluff, Footnotes, Hugs, I love snakes, Kinda?, M/M, Not Beta Read, Post-Apocalyptic, Snake!Crowley - Freeform, Snakes, i guess, ineffable husbands, never done em before, snake hugs, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 01:45:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19285576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bee_Haw_Yee_Haw/pseuds/Bee_Haw_Yee_Haw
Summary: Serpentes, or rather snakes, are elongated, legless, carnivorous reptiles.





	Serpentes

Serpentes, or rather snakes, are elongated, legless, carnivorous reptiles. From the Kingdom: Animalia, Phylum: Chordata, Class: Reptilia, and Order: Squamata. They can be spotted in all continents, bar Antarctica, and inhabit most small islands and land masses.

There are, at least, over twenty families know to man, land and sea, with a variety of colours, sizes and patterns. Uniform or ringed, reds to greens, miniature or massive. With the tiny Barbados Threatsnake at 4.1 inches, to the largest Reticulated Python, who reaches a 22.8ft.

[ Unless you count the Titanoboa, who happens to reach 42 feet and whose fossil was planted as a joke by those of a higher power. Scientists were so clueless, even God was still laughing. ]

Most species do not hold venom, which, if able to secrete, will primarily be to kill and subdue prey rather than for self-defence. This venomous ability, in a selection of snakes, can be capable of ending the life of a man. Otherwise, constriction was the serpent's main trick.

[ The species equally made lovely pets. Especially the Cornsnake or the Bull Python, with their small tongues and adorable faces. Medusa went as far as to have snakes as hair! ]

Now, all of that applies to the typical rat-eating, hissing snake, however, there is one that just doesn't fit the bill.

He was, and still is, the original Serpent, the one to tempt Eve to take a bite, initiator to the Fall of Man. Ink-like, slick and unchanging scales with the underbelly a fiery tangerine, golden slitted eyes that sat side on the sides of his head. Neither is this one is venomous. 

Crawley. But better know Anthony J Crowley.

The demon took pride in his role, of course, Hell had given him a tonne of appreciation as of the time. His first offence after his own Fall. Although God's reaction had seemed a tad overdramatic, it was only fruit. Yet, as Aziraphale had stated, the Almighty's Plan was ineffable, so Crowley had let it slide.

Focusing on the present time, this wily old serpent now had a life down in Soho, London. A constant string of demonic acts, using all of his temptation skills while battling the do-gooder, arch-nemesis, and guardian of the Eastern gate. The typical life of a demonic Earth representative.

[ By "battling", what Crowley actually refers to his having to combat the irresistible puppy dog eyes he'll receive when his angel can't be bothered to miracle himself a cup of tea. A demon of Crowley's status and ability should be able to easily overcome this simple assault, but one must not underestimate the enemy. ]

As a coldblooded creature, Crowley requires a heated environment for his temperature to be up. Most snake owners will have a basking lamp or heating pad in a tank, however, Crowley, who typically walks around on two feet with two arms and slight smirk, considers himself above the average elongated life form. Take into consideration that this demon will shapeshift whenever he feels like it, it's not like you could just leave him in a glass box anyway. He has a mind of his own.

Now, as for regulating his body heat, that is (mostly) what Aziraphale is for. A walking, talking radiator, who is out of style and likes the most luxurious things.

After 6000 years, the celestial being has grown used to the odd appearance of his partner's other form and currently has the rope-like reptile wrapped around his shoulders, scaly snout-like head pressed to his neck as the angel carefully restored his lastest, missprinted bible.

Aziraphale loved him of course, his old Serpent. And Crowley knew this, as the two finally found a steady pace, some time to themselves and a copious amount of alcohol. The excitement of finally being free fueled them throughout the night.

[ Details aren't necessarily here, besides we all get the picture. ]

They'd settled into their new relationship arrangement quite quickly and quite nicely. All the same mostly. Dining at the Ritz or picnics at the park. Feeding the ducks. Small changes like plants and books slowly migrating from one place to the other, both beings basically living at each other's residents. Along with more physical affection, the odd peck on the lips or an arm around a waist.

It was, even though Crowley is not, nice.

There sounded a hiss and the soft flick of a forked tongue against Aziraphale's earlobe.

"My dear, I must finish my work"

Another noise emitted from his companion, louder and slightly aggressive.

"I know, but I don't sleep."

Again, a light and ticking tongue bat, against his jaw this time,

"You can't tempt me, Crowley."

The demon looked up at Aziraphale as if he was wearing the expression of 'are you serious, angel?' Crowley bumped his reading glasses, now askew on the bridge of his nose. 

Aziraphale stared back.

"Okay, maybe you can, still-' The principality cut himself off with a sigh, he gave in like usual. " _Alright!_ I'll join you, my dear."

With a tiny, satisfied hiss, Crowley pops back into existence (draped over his shoulders) and presses a chaste kiss to Aziraphale's ear, before he saunters off, out of the room. Pendulum hips and all angles.

The lamp shut off with a flick and glasses placed down, the round and more squishy angel stood, following after his demon.

**Author's Note:**

> I love these soft boys and the thought of snake Crowley curling up with his angel is pure.
> 
> Do say if there mistakes, or it is too focused on snakes and not our husbands.
> 
> Comments, Kudos, and Criticism are always appreciated.  
> Tumblr - @Bee_Haw_Yee_Haw
> 
> Everything is also posted on fanfiction.net


End file.
